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With bad news all around, from my startup page to whatever I googled, I decided to look for pinoy jokes. Here are some that I found:
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Mrs. Tanoy is a very kuripot. When her husband died, she inquired with the newspaper, asking the price for the obituary.
The ad taker said: “300 pesos for 5 words.
She said: “Pwede ba 2 words lang? Eto lang naman yun… “Tanoy Dead”
Ad taker said: “No mam. 5 words is the minimum.”
After thinking for a while,
Mrs. Tanoy said: “Ok, para sulit, ilagay mo,
“TANOY DEAD, TOYOTA FOR SALE ” …
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Battle of the Brainless
Host: What “N” (narra) is the national tree of the Philippines?
Contestant: Niyog?
Host: Mas matigas pa diyan.
Contestant: (in a strong-sounding voice) NIYOG!!!
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Host: Sino ang national hero na naka-picture sa 500 Peso bill? Clue,
may initials na N.A. (Ninoy Aquino)
Contestant: Nora Aunor?
Host: Hindi. Ang pangalan niya ay nage-end sa “Y”.
Contestant: Guy Aunor?
Host: Hindi. Dati siyang Senador.
Contestant: Si Former Senator Guy Aunor?
Host: Hindi. Patay na siya.
Contestant: ANO??!! PATAY NA SI NORA AUNOR???!!!
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Patayin sa Sindak si Mark
one night…
Mark walks alone in Balete,then he heard…
“Mark!Mark!”
Lumingon siya,
wlang tao.
“Mark! Mark!”
Tumakbo siyaaaaaaaa……
Pagdating sa kanto,he saw a sign:
“BEWARE: NGONGONG ASO”
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Ngeeks. 
I got these forwarded jokes from Christine. I think these are just appropriate with the ongoing ZTE Scandal and the upcoming EDSA celebration.
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PINOY CONTRACTOR ABROAD
Three contractors are bidding to fix the White House fence.
One from the Philippines , another from Mexico and an American.
They go with a White House official to examine the fence.
The American contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. Well,” he says. “I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”
The Mexican contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, “I can do $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me.”
The Filipino contractor doesn’t measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers: “$2,700.”
The official, incredulous, asks, “What? You didn’t even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure? How do you expect me to consider your service with that bid??
“Easy,” the Pinoy explains, ” you see, sir, it’s $1,000 for you, $1,000 for me and then we hire the guy from Mexico “.
The next day, the Pinoy and the Mexican are working on the Fence.
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Q. What`s the difference among Philippine Presidents Cory, Gloria and Erap?
A. Cory can`t tell a lie
Gloria can`t tell the truth
Erap can`t tell the difference
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REPORTER: Sir, kung wala po kayong evidence, witness or suspect ano na po ang next step na gagawin ninyo??
Police: DNA na…
REPORTER: sir, ano po yung DNA ???
Police: “Di Namin Alam “
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Here are Bisaya dubbed movies of Troy and Die Hard 4.
Warning: Medyo bastos.
Lol.
BUTANGI! TUA NA! ATO NI BAI!
From the movie TROY
From the movie Die Hard 4
Go BuloyTube!
Here are some pictures courtesy of Rajah. The two pictures below I think are the funniest among the lot.
1. Oh Peter …
Well, the instruction did say expand ….
2. Indeed …
Well, the instruction did say Find X.. and not.. Compute for X
Here are other math problems solved.
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