With bad news all around, from my startup page to whatever I googled, I decided to look for pinoy jokes. Here are some that I found:

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Mrs. Tanoy is a very kuripot. When her husband died, she inquired with the newspaper, asking the price for the obituary.

The ad taker said: “300 pesos for 5 words.

She said: “Pwede ba 2 words lang? Eto lang naman yun… “Tanoy Dead”

Ad taker said: “No mam. 5 words is the minimum.”

After thinking for a while,

Mrs. Tanoy said: “Ok, para sulit, ilagay mo,

“TANOY DEAD, TOYOTA FOR SALE ” …

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Battle of the Brainless

Host: What “N” (narra) is the national tree of the Philippines?

Contestant: Niyog?

Host: Mas matigas pa diyan.

Contestant: (in a strong-sounding voice) NIYOG!!!

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Host: Sino ang national hero na naka-picture sa 500 Peso bill? Clue,
may initials na N.A. (Ninoy Aquino)

Contestant: Nora Aunor?

Host: Hindi. Ang pangalan niya ay nage-end sa “Y”.

Contestant: Guy Aunor?

Host: Hindi. Dati siyang Senador.

Contestant: Si Former Senator Guy Aunor?

Host: Hindi. Patay na siya.

Contestant: ANO??!! PATAY NA SI NORA AUNOR???!!!

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Patayin sa Sindak si Mark

one night…
Mark walks alone in Balete,then he heard…

“Mark!Mark!”
Lumingon siya,
wlang tao.

“Mark! Mark!”
Tumakbo siyaaaaaaaa……

Pagdating sa kanto,he saw a sign:

“BEWARE: NGONGONG ASO”

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Ngeeks.